So Rebecca has been on the "down low" (yes please give me some street cred for that) for some time but it's time to dust off those computer keys and bring back some laughter into all your lives!
A NewYear and I am confident there will be tons of craziness in 2012 to write about so I need to flex up the dragon nailed fingers and let's get back into this.
A slight recap of some of the more notorious articles of 2011 that I am sure you all read way to much about when they happened so I won't say much about them other than a few Rebecca nuggets.
Lindsay Lohan - girrrlll, you went from being a cute freckled little thing in Parent Trap to a messed up, methed up, teeth jacked up, over bleached dried out bale of hay looking haired thing that clearly needs to just lay low for awhile. So do us a favor in 2012 and stay home with your junkie self and do all the drugs you want - just stop flaunting it in public and making yourself look like a high dollar crackhead.
Kardashians - I lump you all into one because let's face it, there isn't much that one of you does that ALL of you are not involved in. You must get group rates for botox, brazilians and eyebrow waxing. If only Bruce hadn't gone off and branched away from the family surgeon and gotten himself all jacked up looking like he's made of the same "plastic fantastic" shit that Stretch Armstrong was in the 70's. But back to the ladies (and yes I use that term loosely). I'm not sure what the fascination is with the two wanting nothing but black athletes, but I can understand that a lot more than Kourtney and her yuppie want to be baby daddy Scott. I want to believe that boy is blind since he dresses like a yuppie designer in the 1980's threw up all over him. I mean what does she see in that douche bag? He dresses like an nerd with ADHD, spend even 5 minutes with him and you will feel like you need to take a shower, and Kourtney actually spend enough time with this guy to get pregnant with his child? At least there is one up side to it all - when the kid gets a few years older him and Scott will have plenty to do since they will both be on the same maturity level.
Charlie Sheen - not going to even waste my precious manicured fingers to type about him....Lord knows we have seen and heard enough about him to last us through 2012.
Bin Laden - it took us awhile, it wasn't very pretty, but we finally got ya.
Casey Anthony - let's just get down to the basics. She DID IT, we all know she DID IT, she knows she DID IT, and when she dies, her and OJ can sit together in Hell talking about how the DID IT.
And those are just five of some of the thousands of "f-d up" stories of 2011. I could go into detail on all the celebrity breakups (yawn), or the extreme weather that occurred (even Rebecca has a moral compass and knows that's off limits as far as humor), or all the politicians that got caught with their weiners out (yes, that was a classic weiner joke). But we have all year for those type of things too look back on and I'm sure many more in 2012.
So here's to a great, CRAZY 2012 Bitches!!!
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Charlie and the crazy factory
Seriously?? Seriously??
Just when we thought that Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears were the most messed up individuals in Hollywood.....along comes CHARLIE SHEEN!!
I guess it was a matter of time for one of the Sheen's craziness to become public....I mean you can't have that many talented, good looking guys in one family without at least one of them being messed up! But Charlie has taken it to a whole new level these past few months.
He's been in and out of rehab, gone through a few divorces....and even shaved his head like Britney - so his "I'm one messed up bastard" card has been punched more than once. He beats up one wife, does an entire briefcase of cocaine and gets caught on numerous occasions with hookers in his hotel room. But he doesn't stop there. Nope, he supposedly goes into rehab at his home after being pushed by his father only to surface again in 18 days saying that he is clean and sober. Now normally we might believe someone when they say this, however considering after those 18 days he then gets on a plane with one of his ex-wives and two more hookers and heads to the Bahamas.....I'm pretty sure that you aren't quite cured yet dude.
First off - why the hell would his ex-wife agree to go ANYWHERE with him and two hookers?? I mean it's one thing to hang out with ex-spouses, but I'm pretty sure hanging out with Ho's with your ex husband that is known for his benders isn't such a smart thing. Then after less than 48 hours of being in the Bahamas he kicks the ex-wife off the island (no, this was not a new episode of Survivor in the works) and then calls into a radio station only to throw what I would deem as a high level three year old tantrum.
So not only has he ruined his life....but now he's bringing down all the cast and crew of his show by popping off at the mouth and causing the Execs to cancel the show for the season. I'm sure that all the employees are wishing they had something as good as whatever he is smoking/snorting/shooting up to numb their pain and make them not give a shit about life as much as him so that when they can't put food on the table for their families they will be in such a drug induced haze that it won't matter.
I can't help but wonder what crazy antics Charlie will be up to in the coming months? He's already belittled the AA organization and seems to think it is as much of a cult as Scientology, so I am sure that within the coming months he will take it a step further with something like hooking up with LaToya Jackson and having a love child out of wedlock.....or maybe going through a sex change and then have a lesbian love affair with Chaz Bono??
So sit back Britney and Lindsay and be thankful that Charlie has taken the Crazy Ass award from your hands and has now gladly accepted it for all of the world to see. Oh Charlie, can't you see that this is just pushing Emilio further and further up the family favorite list and with each passing crazy ass episode you have that you are chipping away at what was supposed to be yours in Daddy's will??
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Just when we thought that Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears were the most messed up individuals in Hollywood.....along comes CHARLIE SHEEN!!
I guess it was a matter of time for one of the Sheen's craziness to become public....I mean you can't have that many talented, good looking guys in one family without at least one of them being messed up! But Charlie has taken it to a whole new level these past few months.
He's been in and out of rehab, gone through a few divorces....and even shaved his head like Britney - so his "I'm one messed up bastard" card has been punched more than once. He beats up one wife, does an entire briefcase of cocaine and gets caught on numerous occasions with hookers in his hotel room. But he doesn't stop there. Nope, he supposedly goes into rehab at his home after being pushed by his father only to surface again in 18 days saying that he is clean and sober. Now normally we might believe someone when they say this, however considering after those 18 days he then gets on a plane with one of his ex-wives and two more hookers and heads to the Bahamas.....I'm pretty sure that you aren't quite cured yet dude.
First off - why the hell would his ex-wife agree to go ANYWHERE with him and two hookers?? I mean it's one thing to hang out with ex-spouses, but I'm pretty sure hanging out with Ho's with your ex husband that is known for his benders isn't such a smart thing. Then after less than 48 hours of being in the Bahamas he kicks the ex-wife off the island (no, this was not a new episode of Survivor in the works) and then calls into a radio station only to throw what I would deem as a high level three year old tantrum.
So not only has he ruined his life....but now he's bringing down all the cast and crew of his show by popping off at the mouth and causing the Execs to cancel the show for the season. I'm sure that all the employees are wishing they had something as good as whatever he is smoking/snorting/shooting up to numb their pain and make them not give a shit about life as much as him so that when they can't put food on the table for their families they will be in such a drug induced haze that it won't matter.
I can't help but wonder what crazy antics Charlie will be up to in the coming months? He's already belittled the AA organization and seems to think it is as much of a cult as Scientology, so I am sure that within the coming months he will take it a step further with something like hooking up with LaToya Jackson and having a love child out of wedlock.....or maybe going through a sex change and then have a lesbian love affair with Chaz Bono??
So sit back Britney and Lindsay and be thankful that Charlie has taken the Crazy Ass award from your hands and has now gladly accepted it for all of the world to see. Oh Charlie, can't you see that this is just pushing Emilio further and further up the family favorite list and with each passing crazy ass episode you have that you are chipping away at what was supposed to be yours in Daddy's will??
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Monday, January 17, 2011
I always knew having kids was for entertainment....but this is ridiculous!!
Seriously?? Seriously???
Yes, it's another blog about another crazy ass show on TLC. I think there should be a category at the Golden Globes for the show which best exploits children. Because if that was the case then TLC would have a number of entries. They would get 19 kids and counting with the Duggers whose mom's uterus is like a clown car because the babies just keep coming...and coming...and coming! And then there is always Kate and her brood who are on their second show because she hadn't screwed those kids up enough the first go around, so she needs to put them out there again so that when they are all in therapy when they are 20 they will get their moneys worth. Plus, she has to get as many free trips as possible out of this cash cow as well as enough money to continue to get her scanky ass extensions and pay for the McMansion that they live in....all the while the kids are such brats that they get kicked out of school (oops - did I say that out loud?).
And then there is the ultimate in child exploitation....TODDLERS AND TIARAS!!!
Yep, these moms (and in some cases gay dads that aren't out of the closet yet) live out their lifelong dreams through their children by entering them into every cheap ass beauty pageant in the southern hemisphere. All of that of course would not be that big of a deal if they just put these girls in their Easter dresses and let them prance themselves around the stage. But NO - they have to do things like spray tanning....fake teeth....wigs....fake nails...and yes, eyebrow waxing. I'm not sure that I totally understand taking a kid whose body is still forming and saying that they have a unibrow, or their skin is too pale, or God forbid, they lose their BABY teeth - because then we have to get them some false teeth so that the judges will not realize that they are only 7 and are going through the natural changes that a child goes through. So let's make them look like some midget size drag queen jacked up on pixie sticks and dancing around while their parents look like idiots in the crowd making goofy ass noises and hooting and hollering like it's a football game.
The below link is a clip of one of the latest mom's that I am going to for sure nominate for the Mother of the Year award. You will see that she takes her daughter for an eyebrow waxing after the child has had a horrible experience previously. Of course the mother downplays the situation where the salon employee ripped off part of the kids skin.....so she can't understand why her daughter would be fearful to have it done again. So even though she attempts to bribe the child with a bag full of candy (which the child's jaw drops to the floor when she sees it) the child is still hysterical when she realizes that Mommy Dearest is once again putting her through this horrible experience just so she can go into a pageant and possibly walk away with a $5.00 crown and a sash made out of recycled taffeta.
www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfmoms/detail?entry_id81118&tsp=1
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Yes, it's another blog about another crazy ass show on TLC. I think there should be a category at the Golden Globes for the show which best exploits children. Because if that was the case then TLC would have a number of entries. They would get 19 kids and counting with the Duggers whose mom's uterus is like a clown car because the babies just keep coming...and coming...and coming! And then there is always Kate and her brood who are on their second show because she hadn't screwed those kids up enough the first go around, so she needs to put them out there again so that when they are all in therapy when they are 20 they will get their moneys worth. Plus, she has to get as many free trips as possible out of this cash cow as well as enough money to continue to get her scanky ass extensions and pay for the McMansion that they live in....all the while the kids are such brats that they get kicked out of school (oops - did I say that out loud?).
And then there is the ultimate in child exploitation....TODDLERS AND TIARAS!!!
Yep, these moms (and in some cases gay dads that aren't out of the closet yet) live out their lifelong dreams through their children by entering them into every cheap ass beauty pageant in the southern hemisphere. All of that of course would not be that big of a deal if they just put these girls in their Easter dresses and let them prance themselves around the stage. But NO - they have to do things like spray tanning....fake teeth....wigs....fake nails...and yes, eyebrow waxing. I'm not sure that I totally understand taking a kid whose body is still forming and saying that they have a unibrow, or their skin is too pale, or God forbid, they lose their BABY teeth - because then we have to get them some false teeth so that the judges will not realize that they are only 7 and are going through the natural changes that a child goes through. So let's make them look like some midget size drag queen jacked up on pixie sticks and dancing around while their parents look like idiots in the crowd making goofy ass noises and hooting and hollering like it's a football game.
The below link is a clip of one of the latest mom's that I am going to for sure nominate for the Mother of the Year award. You will see that she takes her daughter for an eyebrow waxing after the child has had a horrible experience previously. Of course the mother downplays the situation where the salon employee ripped off part of the kids skin.....so she can't understand why her daughter would be fearful to have it done again. So even though she attempts to bribe the child with a bag full of candy (which the child's jaw drops to the floor when she sees it) the child is still hysterical when she realizes that Mommy Dearest is once again putting her through this horrible experience just so she can go into a pageant and possibly walk away with a $5.00 crown and a sash made out of recycled taffeta.
www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfmoms/detail?entry_id81118&tsp=1
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
My Strange Addiction.....or just crazy????
Seriously?? Seriously??
The latest in the reality junk t.v. on TLC is a show called My Strange Addition. I'm not sure if it should be called that or "I'm just crazy and desperate enough for money that I will show the world what a nut I am". But then again, that title is a little too long for those modern, colorful TLC ads.
As much as I want to turn the channel when this show comes on, it is similar to a train wreck or car accident and I'm not able to turn away. Sad I know, but of course if I didn't watch it I wouldn't have something to rant about on here!
So let me recap a few of the episodes I have seen so far. We have the "semi-normal" ones with the young girls that are addicted to tanning....that are leathery brown and will regret these decisions when they are 50 and look like one huge age spot, but continue to tan up to three times a day. So although those are a little stranger than most of us, they don't even come close to some of the others.
Like the lady that is addicted to eating COMET!! Yes, the household cleanser that you use to scrub out the coffee stains in your sink or the mold from the corners of your shower. She sprinkles it into the palm of her hand a minimum of 10 times a day and uses her fingers like a kids Lickum stick in Fun Dip to dab up the Comet and lick it off her fingers. Now this woman has been doing this for something like 13 years, which has caused the enamel on her teeth to be eaten away and Lord knows what else has happened to her internal organs. Very close to her addiction is the young girl who is addicted to laundry soap (yes, she sees Cheer in a whole different way than the rest of us) and she also likes to eat bar soap. She will either soap up her hands while she is washing them and then LICK the suds off of them, or she will cut up bars of soap to eat them like Godiva chocolates. Now what I don't understand about either of these two females is what in the world makes them try this. I mean I can't think of one time in my life, even when I have been at my drunkest that I thought it would be a good idea to eat any kind of household, clothing, or body cleanser. So is that an addition, or are you just flat out crazy?
Then there is the lady that I can GUARANTEE you is crazy and not "addicted"....her storyline is that she is addicted to puppets. So you would think "Oh, she likes to collect puppets, or play with puppets"....Nope, this crazy bitch has a collection of puppets and one in particular that she drags EVERYWHERE with her. So she doesn't every truly talk to a person, she has her puppets do the talking. Again - this isn't an addiction...it's a crazy person that has convinced the writers of TLC to put her craziness in a weekly show and pay her to show the world what a person who needs to be on meds looks like. Much like Kate did with her and her 100 children?? Hmmmm.....maybe TLC should invite Kate to be on this show.... or maybe the Queen of crazy, Sarah Palin could just nix her boring ass show about Alaska and be the weekly star of this quality garbage show!
So I could go on and on about all the different episodes and the varying crazy people that are on there, but if you need a good laugh, or just want to be reassured that you are far more normal than your momma ever led you to believe...then tune into TLC on a Wed. night and watch the loons in front of the camera.
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
The latest in the reality junk t.v. on TLC is a show called My Strange Addition. I'm not sure if it should be called that or "I'm just crazy and desperate enough for money that I will show the world what a nut I am". But then again, that title is a little too long for those modern, colorful TLC ads.
As much as I want to turn the channel when this show comes on, it is similar to a train wreck or car accident and I'm not able to turn away. Sad I know, but of course if I didn't watch it I wouldn't have something to rant about on here!
So let me recap a few of the episodes I have seen so far. We have the "semi-normal" ones with the young girls that are addicted to tanning....that are leathery brown and will regret these decisions when they are 50 and look like one huge age spot, but continue to tan up to three times a day. So although those are a little stranger than most of us, they don't even come close to some of the others.
Like the lady that is addicted to eating COMET!! Yes, the household cleanser that you use to scrub out the coffee stains in your sink or the mold from the corners of your shower. She sprinkles it into the palm of her hand a minimum of 10 times a day and uses her fingers like a kids Lickum stick in Fun Dip to dab up the Comet and lick it off her fingers. Now this woman has been doing this for something like 13 years, which has caused the enamel on her teeth to be eaten away and Lord knows what else has happened to her internal organs. Very close to her addiction is the young girl who is addicted to laundry soap (yes, she sees Cheer in a whole different way than the rest of us) and she also likes to eat bar soap. She will either soap up her hands while she is washing them and then LICK the suds off of them, or she will cut up bars of soap to eat them like Godiva chocolates. Now what I don't understand about either of these two females is what in the world makes them try this. I mean I can't think of one time in my life, even when I have been at my drunkest that I thought it would be a good idea to eat any kind of household, clothing, or body cleanser. So is that an addition, or are you just flat out crazy?
Then there is the lady that I can GUARANTEE you is crazy and not "addicted"....her storyline is that she is addicted to puppets. So you would think "Oh, she likes to collect puppets, or play with puppets"....Nope, this crazy bitch has a collection of puppets and one in particular that she drags EVERYWHERE with her. So she doesn't every truly talk to a person, she has her puppets do the talking. Again - this isn't an addiction...it's a crazy person that has convinced the writers of TLC to put her craziness in a weekly show and pay her to show the world what a person who needs to be on meds looks like. Much like Kate did with her and her 100 children?? Hmmmm.....maybe TLC should invite Kate to be on this show.... or maybe the Queen of crazy, Sarah Palin could just nix her boring ass show about Alaska and be the weekly star of this quality garbage show!
So I could go on and on about all the different episodes and the varying crazy people that are on there, but if you need a good laugh, or just want to be reassured that you are far more normal than your momma ever led you to believe...then tune into TLC on a Wed. night and watch the loons in front of the camera.
And that's the latest from Rebecca....keeping it real.
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Seriously?? Seriously??
There is something that has been bothering me for some time and I really need to get it out there. I really wish that whoever invented the blue tooth headsets could be bitch slapped into next week.......
My reason for this? Well in the old days, you could tell who the crazy people in this world were because they were the ones walking the streets talking to themselves. But now, because these damn blue tooth headsets are so small and just sit inside your ear, you can't tell who is talking on the phone...and who is talking to their imaginary friends!
I mean I have had to resort to using my quick physical assessment of people in order to try to determine if they are crazy and even then sometimes that doesn't work because now a days people are doing things like wearing pajamas out in public, and house shoes as a normal fashion statement so that just causes even MORE confusion on your decision on if someone is crazy or just has really bad/lazy fashion sense along with an expensive blue tooth that they are talking into. A perfect example of this is the latest fashion nightmare...pajama jeans - which are pajama pants made to look like jeans so when you go out in your jammies you just might fool some half blind people into thinking you are wearing something other than some cheap ass pajamas like the homeless folks down at the local shelter. (really - who the Hell comes up with this shit).....but that's a topic for another day and another blog....now back to the issue at hand...
I truly believe there are two types of people that use blue tooth's....there are the ones that truly are THAT busy (or think they are) that they have to be connected at all times to make all their big time business deals.....and then there are the people that just want to be able to talk NONSTOP without having anything in their way, like driving, shopping, having their hair done, and all kinds of other things people are crazy enough to keep doing while they are flapping their gums.
Now the second type are the ones that you can sometimes confusion with a crazy homeless person - because they are the ones that are usually taking the opportunity while standing in line at the checkout counter to discuss with their "girls" things like their latest love interests penis size....how their cousins latest girlfriend has vaginal warts.....or my favorite which is them recreating their fight with their no-good, down right lazy, no child support paying baby daddy was seen at the local club dirty dancing with that skinny ass, crackhead girl from across town! They are the ones that usually talk about 100 decibels higher than the rest of the universe and seem to think that the entire world can't hear them carrying on their conversations. They are the ones that if you even attempt to give them a "why the hell can't you tone it down" look they will CUT YOU!
So please world, if we are going to keep blue tooth technology, can we at least issue everyone with a blue tooth a shirt that is mandatory for them to wear that says "I'm not crazy, I'm just on the phone"......
There is something that has been bothering me for some time and I really need to get it out there. I really wish that whoever invented the blue tooth headsets could be bitch slapped into next week.......
My reason for this? Well in the old days, you could tell who the crazy people in this world were because they were the ones walking the streets talking to themselves. But now, because these damn blue tooth headsets are so small and just sit inside your ear, you can't tell who is talking on the phone...and who is talking to their imaginary friends!
I mean I have had to resort to using my quick physical assessment of people in order to try to determine if they are crazy and even then sometimes that doesn't work because now a days people are doing things like wearing pajamas out in public, and house shoes as a normal fashion statement so that just causes even MORE confusion on your decision on if someone is crazy or just has really bad/lazy fashion sense along with an expensive blue tooth that they are talking into. A perfect example of this is the latest fashion nightmare...pajama jeans - which are pajama pants made to look like jeans so when you go out in your jammies you just might fool some half blind people into thinking you are wearing something other than some cheap ass pajamas like the homeless folks down at the local shelter. (really - who the Hell comes up with this shit).....but that's a topic for another day and another blog....now back to the issue at hand...
I truly believe there are two types of people that use blue tooth's....there are the ones that truly are THAT busy (or think they are) that they have to be connected at all times to make all their big time business deals.....and then there are the people that just want to be able to talk NONSTOP without having anything in their way, like driving, shopping, having their hair done, and all kinds of other things people are crazy enough to keep doing while they are flapping their gums.
Now the second type are the ones that you can sometimes confusion with a crazy homeless person - because they are the ones that are usually taking the opportunity while standing in line at the checkout counter to discuss with their "girls" things like their latest love interests penis size....how their cousins latest girlfriend has vaginal warts.....or my favorite which is them recreating their fight with their no-good, down right lazy, no child support paying baby daddy was seen at the local club dirty dancing with that skinny ass, crackhead girl from across town! They are the ones that usually talk about 100 decibels higher than the rest of the universe and seem to think that the entire world can't hear them carrying on their conversations. They are the ones that if you even attempt to give them a "why the hell can't you tone it down" look they will CUT YOU!
So please world, if we are going to keep blue tooth technology, can we at least issue everyone with a blue tooth a shirt that is mandatory for them to wear that says "I'm not crazy, I'm just on the phone"......
And that's the latest from Rebecca.....keeping it real.
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Poor Dr. Feelgood
Seriously??? Seriously???
So I'm browsing the latest and greatest news stories this morning and I run across the article in the link below.
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/11/18/2010-11-18_kristina_ross_transgendered_woman_posing_as_a_doctor_jailed_for_giving_breast_ex.html
Basically the article is about a woman that posed as a plastic surgeon and was charged with practicing without a license. So sounds fairly normal, not TOO over the top...but wait - we aren't done there!! The whole thing takes place in Idaho, so there is the first thing to raise a red flag (or should it be a pink flag in honor of saving boobies??) Then I read that she was a transgendered, which I'm down with - Rebecca is hip to everyone marching to their own drummer. So as I'm thinking that he/she is a bad person for pretending to be a Doctor, I read that these "exams" happened in a bar.....Yes ladies and gentleman - IN A BAR!!!
Seriously??? I mean what idiot things getting ANY kind of medical advice in a BAR is a good thing? I mean we've all cried in our beer or cosmopolitan at the bar over lost love, family troubles, a boss we can't stand - and we might even take a scrap of advice from the cute, caring bartender that is listening to us yammer on only because he or she wants a good tip after we are done drowning our sorrows. But would anyone in their right mind, even in Idaho think that getting any medical advice in a bar is a smart choice?
I am hoping that the two females that reported this issue were so drunk that they were confused at first if this was a Girls Gone Wild video, or truly an exam from a Doctor. When asked, the individuals that reported this said they thought she was a real Doctor because "she had an impressive medical vocabulary and discussed surgical procedures like liposuction and breast augmentation." HUH? Oh please - I know plenty of gay men that can use fancy vocabulary about botox, waxing and penis sizes - but you wouldn't assume they are Proctologists!?!?!
Lastly, the name that this woman gave her said "clients" was Dr. Berlyn Aussieahshowna - for starters, the last name sounds like she was trying to say a REAL name and was drunk and slurred it into some long ass name. And did you notice that jumbled up in all that alphabetical mess the word SHOW is in there??? Yep - I don't think that was a mistake, I think good 'ol Dr. Feelgood was having some fun with her potential customers and trying to give them a hint that they were "showing" their goods, and not getting them "examined" - BIG DIFFERENCE. When you are at Mardi Gras, you don't EXAM your breasts for beads...you SHOW them. So tisk, tisk to the bar patrons that didn't catch that little subliminal item!
So while poor, confused, sexually frustrated Kristina is in jail with a $100,000 bond on her pretty little he/she head, these incredibly stupid, drunk ass women that "showed" their goods to her are out running free as birds spilling their stupidity all over the place for others to fall victim of. What trouble will they get into next? Maybe letting a teenage boy at the local burger joint give them their yearly gyno checkup because he "sounds like a Dr." by using big words like Vagina, speculum or pap smear??
And that's the latest from Rebecca - keeping it real
So I'm browsing the latest and greatest news stories this morning and I run across the article in the link below.
http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/11/18/2010-11-18_kristina_ross_transgendered_woman_posing_as_a_doctor_jailed_for_giving_breast_ex.html
Basically the article is about a woman that posed as a plastic surgeon and was charged with practicing without a license. So sounds fairly normal, not TOO over the top...but wait - we aren't done there!! The whole thing takes place in Idaho, so there is the first thing to raise a red flag (or should it be a pink flag in honor of saving boobies??) Then I read that she was a transgendered, which I'm down with - Rebecca is hip to everyone marching to their own drummer. So as I'm thinking that he/she is a bad person for pretending to be a Doctor, I read that these "exams" happened in a bar.....Yes ladies and gentleman - IN A BAR!!!
Seriously??? I mean what idiot things getting ANY kind of medical advice in a BAR is a good thing? I mean we've all cried in our beer or cosmopolitan at the bar over lost love, family troubles, a boss we can't stand - and we might even take a scrap of advice from the cute, caring bartender that is listening to us yammer on only because he or she wants a good tip after we are done drowning our sorrows. But would anyone in their right mind, even in Idaho think that getting any medical advice in a bar is a smart choice?
I am hoping that the two females that reported this issue were so drunk that they were confused at first if this was a Girls Gone Wild video, or truly an exam from a Doctor. When asked, the individuals that reported this said they thought she was a real Doctor because "she had an impressive medical vocabulary and discussed surgical procedures like liposuction and breast augmentation." HUH? Oh please - I know plenty of gay men that can use fancy vocabulary about botox, waxing and penis sizes - but you wouldn't assume they are Proctologists!?!?!
Lastly, the name that this woman gave her said "clients" was Dr. Berlyn Aussieahshowna - for starters, the last name sounds like she was trying to say a REAL name and was drunk and slurred it into some long ass name. And did you notice that jumbled up in all that alphabetical mess the word SHOW is in there??? Yep - I don't think that was a mistake, I think good 'ol Dr. Feelgood was having some fun with her potential customers and trying to give them a hint that they were "showing" their goods, and not getting them "examined" - BIG DIFFERENCE. When you are at Mardi Gras, you don't EXAM your breasts for beads...you SHOW them. So tisk, tisk to the bar patrons that didn't catch that little subliminal item!
So while poor, confused, sexually frustrated Kristina is in jail with a $100,000 bond on her pretty little he/she head, these incredibly stupid, drunk ass women that "showed" their goods to her are out running free as birds spilling their stupidity all over the place for others to fall victim of. What trouble will they get into next? Maybe letting a teenage boy at the local burger joint give them their yearly gyno checkup because he "sounds like a Dr." by using big words like Vagina, speculum or pap smear??
And that's the latest from Rebecca - keeping it real
Saturday, November 6, 2010
Nosey Neighbors Be Gone!
Seriously??? Seriously???
I am close to one of the nosiest people out there. I'll be the first to look through a cell phone if left absently near me (I mean, don't leave it near me if you don't want me to snoop), I'll squint my eyes to try to read what your credit card balance is while I am in your kitchen and near your open mail......but at least I TRY to be sneaky about it. I think people would much rather have someone be like that rather than just blatantly, slap you in the face be with their nosiness! (yep - that's a word I just made up)
So I'm having some work done on my house this weekend - nothing major, just a little work done to the front porch. So as the folks are working away, my neighbor conveniently decides to walk her dogs.....or should I say let her dog run off the leash and over to the workers in my yard so that she can just "happen" to come over into my yard to get a closer look. (Yes little Miss Blondie - I saw your sly move) So I see all of this from inside my house, and it doesn't surprise me since she is like this all the time, and I am actually feeling the slightest respect for her since she is attempting to be sneaky - but at the same time I'm a little annoyed at her boldness.
So, the day goes on and by early evening the workers have cleaned everything up and have headed home. Dinner is in the works and suddenly the doorbell rings. And who should be at the door but Miss Nosey Neighbor herself! And so her attempt to be subtle was to ask if her husband was over at our house!!?? WHAT THE HELL?? I mean in all the 15 years that I've lived here I have never had her husband over, much less closed up in hiding so that she would have to go looking for him behind closed doors!!! Of course once my hubby politely tells her "No", all the while chuckling to himself about her not so subtle ways......she then takes the opportunity to start asking who did the work, how we knew them....and of course, the golden question "Was it expensive??"!!!
Now I'm not living in some Beverly Hills home, with a pool boy and gardener......so it's not like I'm spending millions every year on my home, etc. - but sorry if I would rather just make my home improvements without having to show the neighborhood an itemized spreadsheet!
So read this blog and listen to me ladies and gentleman.....nobody likes an in your face nosey ANYBODY.....so if you are going to creep on someone - do it the old fashioned way and just hide in the bushes or go through their trash!!
And that's the latest from Rebecca - keeping it real.
I am close to one of the nosiest people out there. I'll be the first to look through a cell phone if left absently near me (I mean, don't leave it near me if you don't want me to snoop), I'll squint my eyes to try to read what your credit card balance is while I am in your kitchen and near your open mail......but at least I TRY to be sneaky about it. I think people would much rather have someone be like that rather than just blatantly, slap you in the face be with their nosiness! (yep - that's a word I just made up)
So I'm having some work done on my house this weekend - nothing major, just a little work done to the front porch. So as the folks are working away, my neighbor conveniently decides to walk her dogs.....or should I say let her dog run off the leash and over to the workers in my yard so that she can just "happen" to come over into my yard to get a closer look. (Yes little Miss Blondie - I saw your sly move) So I see all of this from inside my house, and it doesn't surprise me since she is like this all the time, and I am actually feeling the slightest respect for her since she is attempting to be sneaky - but at the same time I'm a little annoyed at her boldness.
So, the day goes on and by early evening the workers have cleaned everything up and have headed home. Dinner is in the works and suddenly the doorbell rings. And who should be at the door but Miss Nosey Neighbor herself! And so her attempt to be subtle was to ask if her husband was over at our house!!?? WHAT THE HELL?? I mean in all the 15 years that I've lived here I have never had her husband over, much less closed up in hiding so that she would have to go looking for him behind closed doors!!! Of course once my hubby politely tells her "No", all the while chuckling to himself about her not so subtle ways......she then takes the opportunity to start asking who did the work, how we knew them....and of course, the golden question "Was it expensive??"!!!
Now I'm not living in some Beverly Hills home, with a pool boy and gardener......so it's not like I'm spending millions every year on my home, etc. - but sorry if I would rather just make my home improvements without having to show the neighborhood an itemized spreadsheet!
So read this blog and listen to me ladies and gentleman.....nobody likes an in your face nosey ANYBODY.....so if you are going to creep on someone - do it the old fashioned way and just hide in the bushes or go through their trash!!
And that's the latest from Rebecca - keeping it real.
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